OPC

Yeah, you better give me the insurance. Because I’m gonna beat the hell out of this car.
-Seinfeld

 

Last night when I was fixing dinner I realized I was out of celery…..so I thought I’d make a quick trip to the store:

Me: I’ll be right back.
Mr. LBB:
I’m parked behind you.

All the sudden I had a feeling of dread. Ugh, it was time…..to finally drive the truck. Mr. LBB has owned his truck for over a year now…..and I’ve never been behind the wheel.

I don’t like trucks….or cars. Maybe it’s because I don’t drive as much as I used to….but all the sudden I feel really inept:

:: I have a fear of OPC (other people’s cars)…..especially if they are trucks.
:: I also have a fear of OPIC (other people IN cars)…..Im better when I’m by myself.
:: Please, PLEASE, don’t make me parallel park when someone is watching.
:: I’m scared sh#$%tless when I have to drive into one of those Jiffy Lube garage bays, when someone’s UNDERNEATH my car?!
:: I feel uncomfortable when someone is riding “hump” because I accidentally make eye contact in the rearview mirror too often.
:: If I see a police officer, I pretend I’m having a serious conversation with Boo to avoid eye contact…..and I start Driving Miss Daisy.
:: I drove for months without dashboard lights on my Prius because I thought they were broken. The dimmer was just turned all the way down.
:: I worry about static electricity when I’m at the gas pump.
:: I’m an automoron…..meaning I’ll walk up to another car (completely different make and model) thinking it’s mine. To my credit: it’s usually the same color.


 

Anyways, last night I finally climbed up into the driver’s side of Mr. LBB’s truck:

I have to put a key in the ignition? (I have a keyless Prius)
Do I just turn the key? ( Apparently diesel is not as easy as you think, this “coil” looking thing has to light up first.)
I think I need a helmet.

I got the truck started, backed it out slowly……and then ran over the neighbor’s curb. With hands at 10 and 2, I drove 30 miles an hour (in a 55) to the store. I drove .2 miles an hour through the one turn signal with a long line of impatient cars behind me. I parked at the VERY back of the parking lot and prayed that no one would park next to me.  It even took me a few seconds to process how to actually put the truck in PARK.

 

But I did it. I made it there and back. It wasn’t so bad.

To the woman in the parking lot that saw my assets: sorry…..there’s no way to modestly get out of the truck with a mini skirt on.


Me: Want a cookie?
Mr. LBB: Yes.
I hand him an oatmeal raisin cookie.
Mr. LBB: Oh…..I thought you said nookie.
Me: It’s not YOUR birthday.

Today is my birthday.  I’m 35……and I was scared of a truck.

 

Are you down with OPC?

 

 

 

Comments

comments

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...

Comments

  1. 1

    Happy Happy Birthday….and I have many of the same car phobias. Car washes freak me out too–especially when I have to pull in on those grid-like things. Sweaty palms for sure!

  2. 2

    Happy birthday!! I am scared of trucks too :)

  3. 3

    I’m OPC/OPIC phobic too! I hate driving period, but when I have to…

    Happy Birthday! Have a SUPER day :)

  4. 4

    So funny! I too do not like driving big cars or trucks. I love my little Z. My husband said its time for a new car…no thank you. I love my car, even if it is 7 years old.

  5. 5

    I love to drive my Dad’s truck when I go home to visit. I forget how high up it is every time I get out and suffer spectacular stumbling, staggering spells with each exit.

  6. 6

    Oh my gosh, this post made me giggle. I’m pretty sure you wrote it about me, haha! I refuse to parallel park, I will walk a mile and drag all three of my kids with me before I parallel park. Automatic car washes also freak me out, I’ll only go to the kind that is all computer. Put a person in there and I’m out! My hubby also has a diesel, for awhile it was our only car and I drove it a lot, but once we got the van I stopped driving it. Now, when I get in it I pretty much have an anxiety attack. I feel like I have to use both feet on the brake to get it to stop because it’s so much heavier than my van. I’m also a horrible “back seat driver” in the truck with my hubby. He’s a great driver but I’m a paranoid rider… I think eventually he’s gonna start slipping me a dramamine.

  7. 7

    It’s my birthday too – and I’m 65. :) Happy Birthday!

  8. 8
    brittany says:

    happy birthday! i’m one of the few girls that drive a big truck and i love it and i’m actually scared of cars because i feel like someone will run me over…but i’ve totally been in your siutation driving someone else’s car and parked all the way in the back. glad you made it to and from safely and conquered a fear!

  9. 9

    Happy birthday Ashley!
    It has taken me a long time to not be nervous driving the big SUV, not sure what I would do with a truck!

  10. 10

    Tillykke med din fødseldag smukke dame!!!!

  11. 11

    Happy Happy Birthday *Ashley* …
    As long as I have the wheel, I can drive bout anything, I am NOT a good psgr at all
    Tks for the story – It was Great as Per Norm <3

  12. 12

    I’m 35, drive a Prius, and am scared sh*tless of having to drive my husband’s ridiculously large work truck.

    A big HUGE Happy Birthday, Ashley! Cheers to another year full of JOY for you!

  13. 13

    First off, Happy Birthday!!! Second, I giggled when you wrote about having to wait for “the lil coil thing to light up” I drive one of those lifted Ford bad boys everyday!! I feel the opposite when I get in a lil car! Like I’m gonna go flying off the road a la Mario Cart! Lol! So I guess I’m down with OPC too, but mostly when it comes to cars, I can drive just about any truck and be comfy.

  14. 14
    Rose D., Frenchtown, NJ says:

    Happy Birthday, sweet Ashley! This post made me laugh hysterically…I thought I was the only one who was afraid of OPC’s!!! Actually, I prefer to stay home!!

  15. 15
    Valerie says:

    My husband has had his Toyota Tacoma truck for 5 1/2 years now and I still haven’t driven it! He keeps telling me I need to in case of an emergency. I tell him I’ll drive it when it’s an emergency.

    Have a delightful birthday, Ashley! Thanks for sharing….

  16. 17
    Tleshia Farrar says:

    LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Happy Birthday!!!!! ENJOY.EVERY.MOMENT.OF.IT!

  17. 18

    Happy Birthday Beautiful! xoxo

  18. 19

    I can SO relate. My husband has that same truck except with a longer bed. I’m getting use to driving it and even starting to get comfortable parking it backwards…with no cars remotely around the space I want to park in. When I have a skirt on it IS very hard to be modest getting in and out. I hate having to make 18 point turns when I just want to make a simple u-turn. On the flip side, I feel very safe in that truck.
    You did good!

  19. 20

    Oh yeah, and Happy Birthday!

  20. 21

    Happy Birthday!! And you should have nookie on your birthday, too!!

  21. 22
    Michele A says:

    I had to learn how to drive and parallel park in my mom’s minivan.. now I think I can drive anything lol that thing was a boat!

    Happy birthday! I hope you have a great day :)

  22. 23
    Heather says:

    Ohmygosh! You sound like me! Except I’d rather drive an SUV than a smaller car… I’m short, so in a small car I can’t see other cars! But I know where you’re coming from! (sadly enough, even the climbing out in a miniskirt!)

    Happy Birthday Ashley!

  23. 24
    Kimberly says:

    I too have a fear of driving other people’s cars….just never knew there was a term for it! Haha…not only does it feel weird & uncomfortable….you don’t know how anything works! Driving down the road and you accidentally turn on the windshield wipers, or worse yet you need the wipers and can’t figure out how to turn them on! Then there is the embarrassment of pulling into the gas station for gas and not having a clue as to what side the gas tank is on…and then trying to figure out where the lever is to open the gas flap only to find out it is old school style, you just get out of the car & flip it open.

    Yes, I avoid it at most costs if I can! My funniest story about this is when I had to drive my boyfriends car over a long holiday weekend…when I had to go to work the following week my car wouldn’t start & I had to call someone to pick me up to bring me to work. later that evening I had my BIL check out my car (a standard 5 speed) and it started right up….guess I forgot how to engage the clutch to start my own car!

  24. 25

    Happy birthday!! Thanks for making me smile!

  25. 26

    Happy Birthday – by the way, what did you need the celery for?

  26. 27
    Jane Patterson says:

    Happy Birthday!
    I will drive anything over having to ride in a ‘foreign’ car. (Control Freak!)
    I have the anxiety over towing something behind the vehicle. Boats and trailers are my nemesis!
    Have a wonderful Birthday!! At 35 you conquered the truck! Celebrate the JOY of yet another thing you have conquered!

  27. 28
    Amber L says:

    Oh Ashley!! I have a truck and I LOVE it! I have had 3 other trucks too! My fave was my extended cab long bed chevy!! But I love your story. You worry too much! :) But glad you made it there and back safe!!

  28. 29

    Happiest of birthdays to you, Ashley!!!!! Praise God for getting older, right?! And regarding the showing of your assets… I find it equally as difficult to dismount gracefully even from my little Subaru. Oh, and I have my 5 year old referring to mine as my fine china and hers as her hoohoo now… Still looking for a good word for the husbands. Front butt just doesn’t seem to cut it! :)
    Have a wonderful day celebrating life!!!!!!

  29. 30
    Danielle says:

    Happy, Happy Birthday Sweet Lady, and thanks for the chuckle!! xoxo

  30. 31

    Happy Birthday Ashley! Funny story… Wishing you a beautiful day full of Joy. The world is a better place with you it! xo

  31. 32
    Grace Hauth says:

    OHEMGEE, Ash! I’m dying laughing over the nookie dialogue! It reminds me of Lisa from RHOBH! Also, do you remember Brett’s champagne colored f150? I had to drive Brett and E home one night down Randolph rd and I’m pretty sure I was in the middle of 2 lanes the entire time!!!! Happy birthday, we love you!!!!

  32. 33

    Happy Birthday! You are hilarious!I am exactly the same way… xoxoxo

  33. 34
    Cary Neess says:

    This is great, my husband bought a very large Dodge much like Mr, LLB. Diesel and stick shift. I have still not driven it, I haven’t had a “lesson” yet. thought the 6 gears make me a bit nervous. Starting in 2nd and reverse is in a different position. By the way, we have had it since 2008!!!

  34. 35
    felicia says:

    Happy Birthday! I’ll be 34 in 2 months and just used the gas grill for the first time ever in my life. Not sure why I was so scared!

  35. 36

    Happy Birthday!
    I have OPC fears too. And I also hate when I’m driving and I end up next to a semi-truck. Even worse is driving between a semi & a concrete barrier, makes me nervous just thinking about it!

  36. 37

    happy happy birthday! And OMG I’m totally afraid of OPC! And pulling into the car wash or bay at jiffy lube type places b/c I’m convinced I won’t line the tires up right. Too freakin’ funny! Hope you have a great day and wishing you an amazing year ahead!

  37. 38
    Gaëlle says:

    Joyeux anniversaire Ashley ^.^

  38. 39

    Happy Birthday! I hopr your day is great!

    I drive my dads truck when they go out of townwith their motorhome because my jeep is the only thing they can tow. The first day I am terrified, can hardly climb in and out of it and park it all the way in the back of lots. After that first day though its a blast to drive. :)

  39. 40

    Happy birthday! Way to be brave!
    I have no problem driving “the truck”. It’s being the passenger on the 10 or the 60 that gets me. I bring a pillow to cling to for propriety’s sake.

  40. 41
    Kristina says:

    I HATE driving OPCs, trucks, minivans, etc. The worst is the drive through car washes that have the narrow guides for the wheels. On a date with my future husband (we just didn’t know it yet), I was so nervous driving into the car wash that I kept lining up the wheels wrong and totally scraped the rims, more than once. At least I was in MY car that time.

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

  41. 42

    Happy Birthday!!!

  42. 43
    Stephanie T says:

    Ashley,
    Happy, happy 35th to you!!!!…and maaaa-nyyyyyy moooooore! Reading your blog makes me so happy and keeps me so entertained that the very least that I can do is wish you a happy birthday. My “baby” turns 17 today. June 2nd is a great day!

  43. 44

    Happy happy birthday beautiful lady. I never in a million years thought I would drive a truck. My idea of perfect is a 67 VW bug then my Hubby bought a new truck last year. Let me tell you….I’m a truck driving mo fo now. Well I still park a million miles away from the store but I’m learning.
    In answer to your question as to whether or not I’m down with OPC…..yeah you know me. (Love that song!) Enjoy your day love!

  44. 45

    Hilarious!! My husband has a truck too and I hate driving it! I have gotten used to it but avoid it unless absolutely necessary. He is going to get rid of it soon and I want him to get a passat because we don’t really need a truck and it will save gas. But now my 2 year old son is in love with it so I am afraid it’s here to stay for awhile! I guess it’s a “man” thing. Happy birthday!!! Hope you are having a fabulous day!

  45. 46

    Happy birthday!!! I also have extreme OPIC fear and am an avid pedestrian :)

  46. 47

    My goodness! In your defense…that’s not JUST a truck, that is a MONSTER! What an accomplishment on your birthday! I usually twist my stories like this to make it more adventerous – “when all seemed lost…and there was no OTHER option, I had to take the MONSTER TRUCK to the store. If there was any hope for dinner to be a success, we needed celery. And the only celery in the galaxy could only be obtained by taking….the MONSTER TRUCK!” – hahaha! I think you did fabulously and I assure you, I would have hit a few animals and mailboxes. Happy Birthday

  47. 48

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! I will be 35 in July! Heres to the class of 1995…Since you are aging so graciously, Im just going to assume I look as young as you do!

  48. 49

    I had to back my car up into a parking spot once. My roommates and friends were riding with me. Bad idea… some random stranger parked behind me tried to direct my car into the spot. I thought she was being nice, then she said “well, I didn’t want you to hit us.” Then, I kept worrying that I would run over some dog (or kid!) and/or kit a nearby car… so I freaked and handed my friend the key.

    No, I’m not 16. Yes, it was embarrassing.

  49. 50

    Happy happy birthday!! I don’t have the same fear of trucks as you, but you sure gave me a giggle reading your post. Keep on truckin’ ashley!

  50. 51

    Happy Birthday!! I too sometimes think I have OPIC.. I think they are all out to get me with their crazy driving habits. I can’t count how many times I’ve seen people pass on the right on the side of the highway (not the right lane, the burm). I think everyone has no patience and no one can drive without holding their phone and driving with one hand. You did well!! Happy Birthday again!

  51. 52

    Happy Birthday!

  52. 53

    You faced cancer AND driving a truck? Check it, your 35th year is going to be fawesome!

  53. 54

    happy happy birthday and many many more… hope your days is filled with love and joy…

  54. 55
    valerie says:

    hi ashley happy birthday beautiful and look forward to seeing you at elevate! hugs

    • 56

      Happy Belated Birthday Ashley! I have been reading your blog for several months now. I want to make sure you know what an inspiration and source of support you have been to me during my cancer journey. My mother was diagnosed with breast cancer in November and I was diagnosed 8 days later. You’ve seemed to hit those emotional speedbumps just a few weeks before I do (the starting chemo, when the hair starts to fall out/needs to be shaved off/and the regrowth, the lack of time for IVF and the feeling of being utterly blessed with one child while facing our sadness that they may never have a sibling. Your strength has given me so much courage, laughter at the absolute perfect time, the importance of faith and positivity and of course joy. May you be blessed this year with as many blessings as you have given to others! Here is a video of me and my mom (we couldn’t be together at all during treatment because she lives in Ohio and me CA). In May she was able to visit while was finishing my tx. http://animoto.com/play/Jzb1XdjWC6xtK7KQ7QcR6A

  55. 57

    This made my day! I SO relate, to all of it. Happy Birthday, btw.

  56. 58

    Happy birthday! And maaaaaaaany more xoxo

  57. 59

    You crack me up! I love driving but only my cars, not others, unless it was something awesome like a Ferrari that I couldn’t pass up driving. Happy 35!!

  58. 60
    Jenn E. says:

    Happy Birthday Ashley :). I hate driving too especially bigger cars/vehicles than I’m used to :).

  59. 61

    Happy Birthday Ashley! I’m with you on trucks! I can’t drive them worth a shit and so I avoid them at all costs.

  60. 62
    Christy says:

    Happy Birthday, Ash!!! I love my SUV. Hate my hubby’s and son’s cars. I like being higher up. Although, Mr LBB’s truck is enormous and I think I would be intimidated by it! Love you guys!!

  61. 63

    Happy Birthday!!

  62. 64

    Happy Birthday Ashley! May you have many many more…
    My husband has had his preowned BMW for about a year and a half now. And I have NEVER driven it. I’m scared sh*tless. It has a weird key system, stops and accelerates differently than my Honda and god forbid I hit something and mar the perfect surface. He decided we are driving it from Chicago to the Maine Coast this summer and I will be expected to drive some, on the way there and around Acadia NP once we hit the coast. Having anxiety attacks already…..

  63. 65

    Have a wonderful birthday! You gave me a good chuckle. Thanks!!!

  64. 66
    Evelene Sterling says:

    Happy Birthday Ashley! I finally got over my fear of driving trucks when I was 21. My friend and I drove to Carmel from San Pedro, California for a vacation and I borrowed my dad’s Ford pickup-stick shift no less and by the time I got back from that trip I was never afraid to drive a truck. Now my husband and I carpool and the women at work constantly ask me if I know how to drive. HaHaHa! They are shocked when I say yes and I also tell them that I know how to drive a stick shift. You should see the look on their faces-priceless!

  65. 67
    Tiffany says:

    Birthdays are the beat, enjoy it!

  66. 68

    Happy Birthday Ashley!

  67. 69

    Happy birthday! This gave me a good chuckle. I drive little cars as a rule, but when we move, I have to do all the driving in the big trucks. This has resulted in 2000 miles from Texas to Washington, then 750 from Washington to Utah, all with just me driving! I don’t blame my husband (he seems genuinely afraid), but I think it’s funny that I’m the one that has repeatedly insisted on small cars (cheaper to buy, better gas mileage, easier to park, and we don’t generally carry more stuff than a normal trip to Costco).

  68. 70

    Happy Birthday!!! More birthdays to come :)

  69. 71

    Happy Birthday!! My daughter and I got in my van today and out of the blue, the battery was gone. We just got back from Kansas on Monday, thank God it lasted until we got home. Drove it all week. So I drove my husband’s new car and stopped at the end of the street for 5 minutes trying to raise the steering wheel. I did it the other night but was totally blank today. Then when I figured it out, I totally did not remember that was how I did it. Brain fart. He’s thin and I can barely get under the wheel when my legs plus knee brace. Why can’t he just leave it to fit me so I won’t have to move the seat or steering wheel. Geez. I also have longer legs. So understand your OPC. I like my van. LOL

  70. 72
    Janey Shaw says:

    Happy Birthday Ashley! I know this is your best one yet!

  71. 73

    HAPPY BORTHDAY!! I can’t believe you have accomplished so much at only 35. Especially since you look more like 25! (In a good way.)

  72. 74

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY ASHLEY! Here’s a twist. It’s your birthday and you gave me a present! Today in the mail I got 40 Choose Joy bracelets. I’ve been wanting them for a while now and finally ordered them and how much more special can it be that they arrived on your birthday. Ashley, I ordered so many so I could carry them with me and give them to anyone I meet that may need to be given that extra boost just like you did for the coffee man the other day with your smile. You are an amazing lady and I admire you more than you can imagine. I will wear my bracelet every day and think of you
    and LBB and Mr. LBB (and his truck) and smile and choose joy. Now go have some cake!

  73. 75

    Happy birthday! You can now check off “drive the truck once” from the list. :)

  74. 76

    Happy birthday, Ashley!

  75. 77
    Coastal Femme says:

    Happy Birthday Ashley
    ! I’m afraid of trucks too. I, like you, have a Prius too and I feel so comfy and secure in it.

  76. 78

    well, from all the comments, i would say we are quite a large club…….
    HAPPY BIRTHDAY

  77. 79
    Karen Crosby says:

    Happy birthday you YOUNG thing! But you’ve been through a lot.
    I do not drive at all so ANY vehicle to even move it a few inches scares me speechless including a riding lawn mower. So there, I admit it. You seem fearless to me as you drove that truck!

  78. 80
    Claudia Mendez says:

    FELIZ CUMPLEAÑOSSSSSSSS!!!!

    Que Dios te cuide hoy y siempre, te queremos muchisimo!!!!!!!

  79. 81

    Hi Ashley! Happy 35th Birthday! I’ve been following your blog for several weeks now and am really enjoying following your crafts and projects, your continuing recovering, your amazing thoughts about life, your adorable daughter and handsome husband, the stories about your dad, and best of all, your resilience and humor. I try to visit your site everyday. Is there a way to read your archived posts? I thought it was pretty cool when I saw your birthday was today, June 2, because today is my birthday too! Good luck with your continued recovery, and keep on writing! You’re a blast to read!!

  80. 82
    Lori P. says:

    Happy Happy Birthday!
    I will be cough cough (49) on Monday.
    June is such a wonderful, fantastic and great Month!

  81. 83
    Shelley says:

    A very happy birthday to a very special person. I just think you are amazing, even if you are scared of trucks. :)

  82. 84

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY ASHLEY :D

    and OPCs… not so much…

  83. 85

    No way! Today is my daughter’s birthday as well!! Happy Birthday! I hope you had a truly blessed day, despite your truck encounter :P

  84. 86

    Too funny, my hubby’s truck is as big as Mr. LBB’s. I like to drive it, but I also drive a Mini Van, so I’m use to being one of the bigger guys on the road. He told me the other day I should try driving one of his work trucks, the seem so much bigger but I think it’s b/c the have caps on the trucks beds,and the light bars make them all offical and “tough looking”. So they scare me, I’m not that into driving other people’s cars, I won’t drive my mother in laws and she and I have the same mini van as I.

    My Husband (Mike) told me the other day he and his boss (Steve) were out and Steve talked Mike into driving his new Ford Flex. Mike told me it was the scariest drive of his life, he kept telling himself don’t hit anything, don’t hit anything….

  85. 87
    Meghan Grace says:

    Happy Birthday, Sweetie Pete!!!! My hubs bought a 2012 HUGE GMC crew cab, super duper shiney, Texas edition, bright red, named Lucille-Sierra pickup on New Years Eve of 2011. I will not even consider driving that truck! LOL! As it is I drive a Chevy Trailblazer that after driving a darling 2001 Jetta, I STILL suck at parking! I really miss that sweet little car! I hope that you had a wonderful, JOY-filled day! Hugs, Meghan

  86. 88
    Leigh Anne says:

    Happy birthday Ashley! With many more blessed years to come ;). and I agree on the OPCs…..serious dislike!

  87. 89

    Happy Birthday! Hope the rest of your day was stress free!!

  88. 90

    Happy Birthday, ha it’s mine too! I knew we were similar once I started reading your blog! You are hilarious and full of courage( even if you dont realize it you silly thang).it’s a nice combo. Thanks for letting us out here in the internet galaxy share your journey. You move me(laughter, tears, pondering, etc) at least once per week? Keep up the good work.;)

  89. 91

    I know you probably get this all the time, but after this post I think you and I are like long lost sisters.. or cousins… or something. I was a Chem Engineering major (although I did love me some math) who quit her “career” to craft and be mom. I doodle, I make lists with real pens and paper instead of electronically, and I have to create something each day or I tend to get cranky. I have major OCD at times and fight my tendency to be an organization/cleaning freak. I am seriously car challenged, so much so that my husband always drives if he’s with me and I park either in the handicap spots (legally) or at the very back of parking lots. I have even pulled up, saw the parking, and given my keys to complete strangers to help me park. … And my birthday is less than a week away.
    Happy Birthday to you! :) Thanks for being you! Your blog is so fun- thanks!

  90. 92
    Jennifer Goldberg says:

    Happy Happy Birthday Ashley!

  91. 93

    Oh Dear Ashley
    You had me laughing so hard here,its yet another coffee splatter bath onto my keyboard =)
    Happy Birthday To You Amazing women !
    FYI .. I turned 50 this past Friday, and driving back up the hill from your neck of the desert woods, We were rear ended,by a gal going 50 while we were at the stop light.
    Ok so the FYI Part Is. Being in a Honking Ford F150 ,with a >trailer hitch< saved our behinds Literally.
    So save Your Tail- Drive a Big Truck I Say!
    Much Love,
    MB–aka DesertNana

  92. 94

    You are such a girl!! I can say that cuz you’re the same age as my kids. Happy b day!

  93. 95
    Tammy O. says:

    Happy birthday Ashley! LOL….Give up the nookie. :-)

  94. 96

    Haha! I drive a 4 door sedan. My husband drives a huge ole SUV. He moved ahead of us out of state and took my car. I have been busy hitting curbs trying to pull into parking spaces (I always park on the end). I had to call him at 10pm tonight because I could not figure out how to get the gas cover open. And Happy Birthday!

  95. 97
    Tiffany says:

    You have no idea how glad I am to know there are others out there like me who are afraid of OPC! I have sucessfully managed to avoid driving hubby’s truck for 3 years now, and I am terrified knowing that I will have to upgrade from my Honda Civic to a minivan in the next year!

  96. 98

    Happy happy birthday!!!!!!! I have many of the same car’s phobia!!!
    Besitos

  97. 99

    1.happy birthday!!!!
    2. I cannot parallel park for the LIFE of me. I’ve successfully parallel parked TWICE. One time I was so excited that I had to post it on twitter. I’m a dork.

  98. 100

    Happy Birthday! This made me laugh:)

  99. 101

    This was hilarious!! Obviously many women feel the same as you. Count me in. I never drove my husband’s car! I don’t even like backing up my own car, and I agree – I’d walk a mile before parallel parking. Aren’t we funny?

  100. 102

    happy birthday from cologne – happy birthday to you marmelade im schuh aprikose in der hooooose happy birthday to you!
    karin

  101. 103

    Ok, I’ve been reading your blog for almost a year now and this is the first time I’ve left a comment but I’m totally with you on this one! Not the big vehicle part, I’ve worked my way from an itty bitty Chevy Cavalier gradually getting bigger until I got my mom bus…a Chevy Suburban…I went gradually bigger each time so it wasn’t such a shock to the system, however, my hubs at one point drove one of those trucks for work with a MANUAL transmission….I wasn’t new to a manual, my parents made me learn it when I started to drive 15 years ago (at 15) so I was never left stranded. Totally grateful for it, but something about controlling that giant pickup and having to use a clutch scared the begeebers out of me. I was definitely the one going slower than the speed limit, and reverse, that was plain and simply OUT OF THE QUESTION! Just felt compelled to share that you’re not alone…

  102. 104
    Margaret R says:

    I know what you mean. I drive a jeep commander which is not a small car. It is a mid-size SUV. Bigger than a van but smaller than a suburban. My husband has a truck. Whenever I have to drive the truck I feel like I am driving a tank and I always park way away from everyone because I am sure it won’t fit in those other parking spaces.

  103. 105
    Lizelle says:

    A belated Happy Birthday! :-)

    I had such a good laugh! My husband also has a truck (which I have not driven anywhere) and I avoid parallel parking where possible – often park much further away fr where I need to be just to NOT parallel park!

  104. 106

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! And you’re definitely not alone with the OPC/OPIC thing. Add to that driving down streets with cars parked on the sides. (Which means after 3 years of living in Germany, I’ve not once gotten behind the wheel.) Congrats on facing your fear :) Perhaps you’ve crossed another off your 40 by 40?

  105. 107

    Hilarious! I am the same way driving other cars and my hubbies truck. I hate parking large vehicles and have no idea how I can upgrade my vehicle once we have kids. My little toyota corrolla is a perfect size for me!

  106. 108

    LOL! :) HAPPY BIRTHDAY, ASHLEY! :)

  107. 109
    Heather H says:

    I can’t say I have any of those fears or problems. I learned to drive in a big vehicle. My first car was a big vehicle. Yeah not a problem for me. hehe

    Happy birthday! I hope you have a great one.

  108. 110

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!! Have a truly blessed one all the way from Norway – people here love the Fear will not rule – t-shirt

  109. 111

    I so loved this post. We bought an F250 with a 6 inch lift 3 years ago. I was TERRIFIED the first time my husband made me drive it. I was convinced that someone was going to die that day. I too, parked at the end of the parking lot, in three spaces. Today, I can park that thing anywhere, I LOVE to drive it, I feel super tough and not so tiny like in my car. It snows a lot where we live and my Mustang isn’t always able to get out of the driveway, so I have to drive it out of necessity. Keep driving it and you’ll learn to love it too!

  110. 112

    Happy happy birthday!!
    Love,
    María

  111. 113

    I totally understand your fear of driving that truck! My husband has an F250, and being a measly 5’3″ it is a challenge for me to drive it! It’s like sitting in the front of a bus, and turning circle? What turning circle? Also I have to have the seat ALL the way forward so I can push the clutch all the way in….makes for a funny image when I open the door. Luckily I don’t have to drive it often…

  112. 114

    LOL, I laughed about this, because I’m the same way. I really don’t enjoy driving…I loved it in my 20s, and then got in an accident when I was pregnant (no injuries, and sadly, it was my fault, blecch), and haven’t much enjoyed driving since. Like you, I don’t like driving OPC….my husband inherited a 1965 Mustang and I wouldn’t even drive it into the garage. And I have a Prius that I thought was “damaged” after I took it in for detailing in December. When I got it back, my dashboard lights no longer worked! Finally I, too, realized the dimmer was all the way down. :)

    Hope you had a great birthday!

  113. 115

    Happy Birthday, Ashley!! May God continue to bless you with many more!!
    I have to say I”m the total opposite here! I love BIG MAMA trucks and I wish I had one, if only gas wasn’t so darn expensive!!

  114. 116

    Happy Birthday! It’s equally hard to get out of a low-riding civic without showing your “assets”, which I did to my friend’s neighbor today. I smiled and waved and then realized I had flesh colored underwear on and my husband always says it looks like I have a Brazilian when I wear it because it matches my skin so closely. I think my friend’s neighbor think he got a much better show than he actually did.

  115. 117

    Hahaha! I love to drive trucks so much that when my husband is with me he panics because he says I get crazy when I drive a truck. I guess (since I’m small- 5’2″) I like the control I feel when driving a truck. Aside from that I can totally relate with you on all the others- like pretending to speak to my little one so I do not have to make eye contact with the cops, or I hate it when I have to parallel park (even when no one is around) and so on….

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! I hope your day was filled with blessings. And Cheers for many more b-days to come!!!!!

  116. 118

    Happy, happy birthday, Ashley!

    My first truck was an ’86 Ford diesel – I adored that truck. It was awesome for driving around Atlanta, because people were scared of it! Before I got that, I used to drive Dad’s truck on summers home because I couldn’t see out of the Malibu. The only car I’ve ever liked to drive was the Crown Vic (recently wrecked).

    I only dislike driving other people’s cars because of “cultural” reasons (never touch another man’s truck, or his hat). I have no fear about it!

  117. 119
    Dorothy says:

    Awww… Happy Birthday Sweet Ashley! Hope you had a wonderful day, yesterday, and today:)

  118. 120

    I love calling it OPC! And yes, I have a major phobia of driving OPC´s, probably because my dad always said that cars are not something to borrow or lend.

    But I learned on a ´77 chevy silverado truck because my dad said if I learned to drive a big car, then I could drive any car. But now I drive a small car by choice.

  119. 121

    Happy belated bday!! You are hilarious, lady. I don’t drive trucks though, and I share your fear of driving OPC. My hubby has a Chrysler 300 and every time I’m behind the wheel I feel like Alice and I’ve just downed the “drink me” shrinking potion. The thing is a beast compared to my little Honda! It’s like walking around in someone else’s shoes. Weird weird weird. BUT, congrats on becoming a trucking mama… and on your bday no less. Happy Day! :)

  120. 122

    That is a HUGE truck compared to a prius. I would have been terrified to drive that truck too! And I think it’s awesome that you have a smart key system. :)

  121. 123

    Happy Birthday! I hate to drive my husbands big diesel truck too, plus it’s a mega cab which means there is an extra SMART car in the length. Hope the rest of your birthday was great.

  122. 124
    Vicki Turner says:

    Happy Belated Birthday Ashley…haven’t been online in a couple of days. Love your driving story…lol.
    Love cousin Vicki

  123. 125

    LOVE this story. You seriously crack me up, Ashley! Happy belated birthday!!! I hope it was a wonderful day!!!

  124. 126

    what a great post! it gave me a good laugh to start my day! and i thought i was the only one with OPIC! ha ha ha! i always get nervous driving with others in my car as well. prefer, and do better driving alone. and the truck…i haven’t driven my husbands since i ran a red light with it and almost took out another truck that was crossing through the intersection. i swear the light was green, my sister who was driving in a car behind me asked why i was yelling at those guys when i had gone through a crimson light. eeeeeeps! awful. i refuse to drive his truck anymore. i’ll stick with my “little” car.

    happy, happy, happy belated birthday! aaaaahhhhh…a gemini! :) i’m reading post a couple days late, but it was kind of neat to read it as today is my daughter’s birthday. hope you had a great day! :) 35 is a great age to be. :)

  125. 127

    Happy Birthday!!! :)
    I used to be so terrified behind the wheel but now I’m a little like Danica Patrick in a mini van. Lol watch out now! :-P

  126. 128
    Donna O'Neil says:

    Happy Birthday!
    I hate cars. I hate driving and I hate other people’s cars. I hate driving so much that I put off getting my drivers license until I was almost 30. I learned how to drive at a normal age but I did not bother to get it until I had a job where I couldn’t take BART to. Now I am a catering manager and have 2 trucks that I REFUSE to drive.

  127. 129
    Krystina says:

    Oh I am SOOOOO down with OPC/OPIC and MIC (Mother in Car). I have only rented a car 2 times in my entire life and it was so stressful I couldn’t enjoy my vacation as much. I was constantly worried about scratching or denting a car I didn’t own!

  128. 130
    Claudia says:

    Hey Ashley, happy belated B-day ! You are so darn funny woman ! I can just imagine you showing your “assets” to that suprised woman ! Ha ha ha ! And as you can see, you are not the only one who hates big trucks (I also have a Prius) and parallel park (I will park 3 or 4 streets down to avoid parallel). I also do not know my car’s dimensions, even after 6 years, which makes for some funny (scary) parking patterns for my car. I also do not like when other people drive MY car. Most people do not know what to do to start a Prius… Thanks again for making me laugh !

  129. 131

    Happy Happy Birthday! You have triumphed over one heck of a year!

  130. 132

    *GASP* Don’t you tell ANYONE, but I’m actually 11 days younger than you. If anyone asks, I’m still 28.

    Last week, I went to see my husband for lunch, and I don’t know if it was the new dress or what, but I drove by a parallel parking spot, saw it as HUGE and literally whipped into it. No worries. Once I was IN the spot and the moment passed, I realized how really NOT big the spot was, and was wondering how easily I’d be able to get out of it!

    Happy Birthday. Hope you got everything you wanted. The UPS guy just brought a package that I suspect is an extra large silk screen! Excited!

  131. 133
    Barbara Kiphart says:

    You are so funny girl…your assets. I rented a truck at Home Depot to drive a new big BBQ grill home. I am not intimidated by size so I just crawled up in that big boy and drove to my house…honked the horn and the strong boys picked up the BBQ and I drove straight back to HD. Now picture this…it’s easier pulling your old fat out-of-shape body up than it is lowering if down. I opened the truck door and like a fool did not prepare when I made my first step down, I missed the truck step and stepped (fell) all the way to the pavement. Not a pretty sight but I was saved by some sweet young men who even went and got my car for me so I wouldn’t have to trek across the parking lot. Chivalry is not dead. I was 69 and I got home with my assets intact. And Ashley I can picture you at 69 being the same (but not short & fat)…just climb up in the truck and take care of business because that’s what you do with life. I’m late for the Birthday wishes but I hope it was everything you hoped for & more.

  132. 134
    Stacey Kirk says:

    Happy Birthday to you! :) In 1995 the car I owned died so I bought a small 5-speed truck that I COULD NOT drive because I could afford it. I had a few (and I do mean few) lessons under my belt in driving a manual but not enough to feel like I could actually go somewhere. I took side streets to bypass stoplights and hills until I finally figured it out. Then after getting married, my husband sold his automatic car and got a large automatic Dodge so we owned two trucks for several years. I actually developed a dislike of cars because I felt too low to the ground! :) Drove my bosses Volvo to post office once and someone backed into me as I was leaving. Yep, hated cars. Then we bought my bosses (a different boss) VW to make room for three kiddos so I feel pretty balanced these days. We still have that little 5-speed truck, by the way, and another large Dodge. Can’t seem to let them go! :)

  133. 135
    Victoria W says:

    Happy Birthday!! I don’t like driving OPCs either.

  134. 136

    Men are all the same no matter what the age. Im just sayin

  135. 137
    mylittlenuggets says:

    First, I didn’t realize that I also have a serious issue, I call it “dwp”: driving with passengers. While alone, I have the confidence of a jet fighter, cruising thru traffic (maybe driving in NYC helped) — but put a passenger in my car and I flip. I become insanely careful, worried if I’m not driving up to par, slow, fast, etc.

    And yes, I have issues with the “Creepers”, folks who drive too close to your tail, and then I make a lot of eye contact b/c I want to prove a point that they are being jerks. Driving is such a private time, but yet so exposed ;)

  136. 138

    Happy birthday!!

    I definitely am nervous when I’m driving someone else’s car…I have an irrational fear that a semi will hit me and their car will be wrecked while I’m at the wheel.

    My mom has an Excursion, so I’m used to big cars–it’s what I learned to drive with, but I still freaked out when I had to drive a friend’s Durango from MI to Ohio (5hrs). I’ve never been so careful/slow in my life.

  137. 139

    We have had a truck like yours for 10 years and i have never been near the drivers seat and am not planning on it any time soon. I dont like other peoples vehicles and i dont really like other people driving mine. Happy birthday, i hope you celebrate all month.

  138. 140

    Happy Belated birthday!!!!

  139. 141

    Happy belated birthday Ashley! My daughter drives a huge full size Chevy truck. The few times I have driven it, I just want to yell “get outta the way!” lol, but I am still here. Haha

  140. 142

    omg — way too funny. so funny. thank you.
    and happy birthday :)

    I drove my dad’s truck ONCE to pick up something-or-oher-that-he-needed-somewhere-or-other that happened to be quite close (5km maybe?) on country roads. You know, the wide sort. But it happened to have the snow plow on the front of it as well. So I felt like I was taking about 1.5times the FULL width of the road. I met ONE car on this ‘adventure’ and felt like closing my eyes and hoping for the best. I left my eyes open, but hoped for the best. Years later, I live to tell the tale, so obviously I survived.

    but i haven’t driven a truck since.

  141. 143

    ‘Yeah, you know me’
    Happy bday- mine is on Flag Day, the 14th

  142. 144

    I’m totally with you on the whole parallel parking thing, can’t do it, don’t even try to do it properly (i.e., how my driving instructor taught me) any more. Driving someone else’s car fills me with dread. I have to go round and round in a circle, somewhere quiet until I get the hang of the sensitivity of pedals, the different clutch (in the UK most cars are manual gearbox not automatic which means clutch pedal and stick shift), and where the indicators are (left of steering wheel, right of steering wheel, or my OH’s car is a button on the dash – bizarre).
    Well done, you finally drove that truck, now it’s not an OPC!
    ClaireBear

  143. 145
    Angie P says:

    Hope you had a fantabulous birthday!!!

    OPC. I dig it. Back when my husband I were still dating, Considering y knack for landing in really weird predicaments, I refused to drive his truck for at least a year, until the night my breaks went out…right before I had to make an hour-and-half round-trip drive. Nerve-wracked, I sat up so straight and alert that I came home with a furious tension headache and one mean backache!

  144. 146

    What a wonderful day to celebrate your birthday! Happy, happy, happy life!!!

Trackbacks

  1. [...] so we could test drive the car.  I made Mr. LBB drive…..you might remember that I have that huge fear of OPC? Well I have a fear of OPDOPC too: other people driving other people’s [...]

  2. [...] girls dying at Pompeii and their lack of carpets, it taking 4.9 years for my hair to grow back, my fear of cars, and creepy babies……so don’t forget the corn on the cob post and national [...]

  3. [...] and trucks give me anxiety in general (this is MORE than just OPC).  No offense to any truckers out there. I just think I watched Stephen King’s Maximum [...]