He Likes Chili and Comic Books

I like chili and comic books too.  So that’s that.

Boo cast her ballot yesterday at school:

This is so much better than the convoluted ballot I had to fill out in CA…..is it just me or are all the propositions on the ballots impossible to interpret?  I had to do an incredible amount of research on each proposition just to make sure I voted the right way.

I loved every minute of election talk with Boo…..a few examples:

Me: Do you know who you are going to vote for today?
Boo: Yes. But I don’t have to tell you.
Me: You’re right….and I don’t have to tell you either.
Boo: (laughing) I already KNOW who you are voting for. I’ll tell you who I voted for if I win.

(I honestly thought she might write in Boo Hack…..)

After school yesterday:

Me: Let’s go home and watch the election.
Boo: It’s over. Mitt Romney won. He got 49 votes and Obama got 3.
Me: Not your school election….the real election.
Boo: We HAD a real election.
Me: I mean the adult election.
Boo: Did you know Rock Obama is a “south paw”?
Me: What’s that?
Boo: It means he’s left handed….just like me. I’m a south paw. He also likes chili and comic books and he has two daughters.
Me: Good info!
Boo: Mitt Romney has 5 sons….and he gave a lot of money away.
Me: Does he like comic books too?
Boo: I don’t think so. He’s kind of serious. Oh, did you know my teacher had jury duty? On Oct 5th.

(she. never. stops. talking.)

 

It was fun having her color in states as the night went along:

 

This is not meant to be a political post but it’s probably as close as I’ll ever get to one.

I told Mr. LBB that I felt like I needed to post something last night because if you know me personally…..I feel pretty strongly about politics…..so for me to leave something like that out…..it’s not me being real.  I write about personal stuff….I shouldn’t have to hide my political feelings for fear of backlash.   So I posted something…..

I’m more in the center when it comes to politics and I lean into the libertarian category.  I’m liberal on many social issues. I want more personal freedom, more tolerance, smaller government and a stronger economy.  That means I don’t really fit into the 2 party system…..but guess what….I have to make a choice.  I  have a diverse group of friends who are all over the place politically.  They respect my view and I respect theirs…..although we banter back and forth throughout the entire election season…..but I’ve never had to defriend anyone.  Last election, when I said I wasn’t voting for Obama, one friend called me “racist” and immediately defriended me.  This election a friend asked for specific examples of something and I gave her about 20. She defriended me without responding.  That’s crazy. I’ve been called an idiot, racist, close-minded, ignorant, Mitches (thanks Beyonce!) etc……which is funny because I feel like I’m pretty smart and informed…..I read no less than 15 news sites every morning from every political point of view. My husband and I own our own businesses. I navigate the tax laws monthly.  If I don’t understand something…..I make sure I figure it out. I don’t have  a uterus…..so I’ll stay out of that.

Anyway, last night I posted on Facebook that I was disappointed in the election outcome but that life goes on. Anyone that knows me knows that I don’t dwell on disappointments for more than about 3 seconds.  I was already figuring out how I would seize today……  One of the first comments on the post was:

Hmm…Unsubscribing. You can spread your negativity elsewhere. Today is a great day for our Nation.


Okay….here’s my full post:

Well tonight didn’t go as I wanted it too…..but I expected half the nation to be disappointed either way. I believe everything happens for a reason. Just a few words of encouragement for both sides tonight: Life goes on tomorrow. Hang in there. Stand tall. Encourage others. Pay every kindness forward. For the small businesses: just make it through 4 more years…… hope to see you on the other side! Hard work…. honesty….. humility….. respect….. accountability…. self reliance…..and you’ve got this!! We live in a great country. We all share the hope for it. God bless America. Support American business!! Support small handmade businesses! #choosejoy

 

Unsubscribe away if you think that is negative because you’ll be disappointed in anything and everything else I’ve ever posted or will post.

 

The comments went downhill from there with insults and attacks on other commenters.  I spammed many of the ugliest ones that were directed at people other than me……and honestly I just got too tired to read through them anymore to keep doing it…….so I’m sorry.

Yesterday, I voted for what I thought was best for the country……not what was best for me.  I know the majority of voters did the same.  We all share the hope for our country. Good for you if you got out and cast your vote….no matter who it was for.

 

*****

My biggest concern right now is what we are telling our children from the rhetoric I saw from both sides on the social networks last night and throughout the entire election…..I repeat…..from BOTH SIDES. I’ve taught Boo that “hate” is a bad word. We never say we “hate” someone.  And why take the energy to hate someone…..what a waste of perfectly good energy! I’m also trying to teach her that, in reality, there are not SIDES.  There’s radical left, left left, left center, center, right center, right right, radical right…..and a whole other multitude of dimensions after that.   If you use the phrase “you people”….you are mistakenly categorizing many of those together. And we really have more in common than we might think sometimes.

Whenever Boo and I would discuss the election I broke it down as easy as I could for her with facts.  And guess what the first thing she said at school was when they talked about the election?  “Obama is expensive.” I was mortified…..but at the same time I was proud that she didn’t use something like: hate, communist, racist, idiot, murderer, liar, failure.   I don’t think those words should never be used in a political conversation seriously…..and especially around children. And I see it being flung all over the news, and Facebook and Twitter.  And FYI, I told Boo that Romney was expensive too….just less expensive in my opinion.

name calling: the use of offensive names especially to win an argument or to induce rejection or condemnation (as of a person or project) without objective consideration of the facts

So that’s that.

 

I sent Boo off to school today with the assurance that everything will be okay and that there is nothing to fear.  I showed her the newspaper with the photo of President Obama and his family and explained that even though Mommy and Daddy don’t agree on everything that the President does….we have to be respectful of him.  I told her that President Obama was a humble, gracious winner last night and that he tried to give the American people encouragement.  I told her that we needed to pray that he would be able to fix the economy…..because without the economy no candidate can take care of anything.  I told her that President Obama loves this country. I told her that we want nothing more than for President Obama to succeed…..because we love our country. I told her that Mitt Romney lost graciously and that he tried his best and that’s all that matters. I told her that Mitt Romney loves this country too. I told her I gave Obama a chance the last four years but sometimes people need second chances….but President’s don’t get third chances…..and we should be thankful for that…..and maybe that should apply to more political offices. More importantly, I told her to make sure she was respectful at school about the President and to not worry if others weren’t respectful of our family’s choice. That’s their issue. I told her that almost the same amount of people voted for Obama as voted for Romney…..and that’s a LOT of people that feel strongly on different sides.  I just imagined how angry some people were this morning and what their kids went off to school thinking…..it made me sick to my stomach that any child would start their day off like that.

 

Anyway, let me end this post.  I’m not going to tell any of you what to do…..because I don’t want anyone telling me what to do (it’s that personal freedom thing) but here’s what I plan to work on going forward:

I’m not going to hate you.

I’m not going to judge you.

I’m not going to insult you.

I’m not going to defriend you.*

*for just having a different opinion…..although I reserve the right to delete and block posts that hate on and insult others…..hate on ME all you want…..but I’ll draw the line somewhere.

I’m not going to gloat.

I’m not going to complain.

I’m not going to point fingers.

I’m not going to say you were wrong for voting a certain way.

I’m not going to say “you people” and follow it with a rant.

I’m not going to live in fear.

I’m going to be compassionate.

I’m going to work twice as hard.

I’m going to work three times as hard.

I’m going to depend on myself.

I’m going to be honest.

I’m going to be humble.

I’m going to be respectful.

I’m going to be tolerant.

I’m going to be accountable.

I’m going to be responsible.

I’m going to give back.

I’m going to try and do the right thing.

 

 

Have a great hump day….

xoxo,

Ash

 

 

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Comments

  1. 1

    You and I sound very much the same when it comes to politics. I, too, was disappointed by the outcome of the election for similar reasons. I own two small businesses. We will carry on with our heads held high, with the hope of synergy over the next four years. Things can and will get better if we all work together.

  2. 2

    I am ot an American but I was surprised by your post last night, not in a good way… I did not react to it, but Woul not have used such strong words if I had. Youre free to soeak your mind but I thought it was a bit out of place…

    • 3

      Thanks Esther. Just curious as to why you thought it was out of place?

      • 4

        It didn’t feel like a sort of post you would put out there, with a political tone. But maybe thats because in my country we don’t talk about your political preference, so I am not used to it?

  3. 6

    This is such a beautiful post. I thank you for it. I feel the same way and I was sick to my stomach last night as I saw my Facebook feed fill with posts about how this was the end of things for the nation. Thank you!

  4. 7

    Thanks for this post! I’m glad you did say something. We are passionate about politics at our house and are also disappointed in the results of the election, but like you we were and are very careful to portray our views to our young kids as charitably and factually as possible. This is a teaching moment for families in so many ways. I loved that you pointed our how graciously Romney conceded and that Obama humbly accepted. I’m also lifted by the thought that God will always be in charged no matter who is elected as president anywhere. This IS His plan. Prayers are rarely answered like we expect them to be. Let’s keep praying and see what happens!

  5. 8

    Amen!!!

  6. 9

    AMEN, SISTER! That is exactly what I tell my children! Regardless of the outcome, we are to be respectful of the office (and of others), and we are to pray for our leaders! God knew the outcome of the election before we did, and He is ultimately in control of it all! And even if you didn’t share my same opinion, you would still rock! YOU ARE AWESOME!!!

  7. 10

    I read your post on FB waking up this morning – and was SO happy – I live in Norway, my girls’ father is American – so I have a lot of American FB friends – and almost all of them have been writing for days at end about voting for their favorite – telling us we’re not good Christians if we don’t

    it makes me really upset that other people judge other people’s faith over political conviction –

    so your post was a breath of fresh air, stating YOUR opinion, without judging ANYONE else – let them defriend you! It’s their loss!!!

  8. 11
    Kris Reynolds says:

    Beautifully written.

  9. 12

    I could not agree more with everything you said. Everything. Thank you for having the courage to write it :)

  10. 13

    My son was getting quite upset that the election was not going as he wanted it to go (he is 9). He was being negative (his basis on who to vote for was not much different than Boo’s). I told him that even though I vote in every election, my person usually does not win (I am talented in picking the winner, clearly). I also told him that America is based on lots of great principles – freedom and liberty for all being the basis for it all. I told him that once the election is over – that person is the President of the United States of America – OUR country. And we love our country. And therefore, we respect and stand behind our leader. Always. If we don’t, then what hope is there?

    So you are right – support businesses here, support creating things here, be responsible, be accountable, choose joy.

    When a person chooses to attack, degrade and sling insults, that says a whole lot more about his or her character than who he or she chooses to support in an election.

    As usual, you go girl!

  11. 14

    Initially when I read your post on facebook I was a bit disappointed. Not really because about what you said more because my timeline was exploding with negativity at the time. I just felt that because of your large following you were opening an additional gateway into the craziness. I couldn’t understand why you would do that. However after reading this post and seeing that you are passionate about politics I eased up. I understand why you needed to say something. You are right you do write very openly and honestly so I guess I shouldn’t expect anything less despite the circumstances. I’m glad that you’ve stood your ground and I respect you more than I did before.

  12. 15

    What a well written post, you said it beautifully. It’s so refreshing to visit your site and know that I’m going to read a positive take on such a hot topic, thank you for speaking your mind!

  13. 16

    Thank you. This is the first post about the election,or the outcome that I truly can appreciate. You stayed kind and positive and taught your child to do the same. That is amazing in someone that truly has an opinion politically.

  14. 17

    As always, wonderfully written! You are being a wonderful example for Boo!

  15. 18

    I saw your post last night and felt like it was simply you. I could tell you were disappointed but even so it was full of encouraging words. I love your motto to “choose joy” and love how you apply it to all areas of your life. I think it’s wonderful.
    Thank you for this post. Sometimes I think we all needs reminders that it’s ok that we don’t all think and believe the same way. Something I’ve tried to point out during this election season to my daughter. That’s what makes America so great.
    Thanks again!

  16. 19

    It all kind of amazed me – the comments. Maybe it’s because the election didn’t go my way either – but I didn’t see or feel anything negative in your post last night.

    I haven’t seen much negativity today … mostly because my friends are quite liberal. Me? Financially conservitive – socially liberal … though, that’s not a hard line. I could sway either way on a given issue. I don’t really fit in the Republican party either.

    Someone said it well last night that the Republican party is like Mad Men in a Modern Family world.

    … off to make chili for dinner … ;-)

  17. 20

    Such a beautiful post. I agree with you completely. And I read your post last night and was happy to read something coming from someone on “our” side who said they are disappointed, but stated it so elegantly and I think perfectly to please everyone. I know last night I was pretty upset, but luckily didnt have to explain anything to my daughter since she is only 7 months. This is a great lesson for any and all parents out there how to handle major political issues and conflicts with their children (and friends of opposing views). I know I will take a big lesson from this post and something I WILL remember every four years as my babe grows older. Thanks Ashley! XO

  18. 21

    I was excited at the results last night, but at the same time, I was saddened that so many people were saying mean things to each other. Today a friend posted advice that she had been given years ago: “”Not everyone thinks like you do.” It is important to remember we each have our own opinions, and even if we don’t agree we all deserve to be respected.
    My 6yr old nephew gave a good reason why he would vote for Romney (his school was also voting). He said, “Obama has been president for a long time, and he should share and give Romney a turn.” that made me smile.

  19. 22

    Being a Canadian, I paid attention to the election somewhat, but not as much as a Canadian one (obviously). I should also mention here that I’m a Newfoundlander, and us Newfies are not exactly “friendly” with our Prime Minister.

    I really respect that you would put something so personal out there, and I wish more people were so open :) Although our opinions differ, we’re from separate countries so my opinion isn’t really all that important (since I can’t vote and all lol). And, despite which side you stand on, there are three things to be thankful for:
    1. The political campaigns are over! (and all the phone calls more importantly!)
    2. You only have to choose between two candidates, we have four!
    3. You could have been stuck with Stephen Harper… lol

    • 23

      Haha! I had to laugh reading your comment. I am also Canadian. (I live in Alberta) and I 100% agree with you on number 3. lol

  20. 24

    Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you.

    Seriously. I love this. You put my thoughts into words.

    After it all ended last night, I still woke up in the greatest country in the world, and for that, I am grateful.

  21. 25
    Julie Smith says:

    Thank you for your post. I needed it. Though I was disappointed in the outcome of the election too, I am mostly disheartened by the tone of the discourse this year. Your kind and thoughtful words have lifted my spirits today.

  22. 26

    I too was disappointed last night. I really thought that Romney was the best for the country at this time. The strength, responsibility, and restraint he showed in the storm of a difficult campaign was a important factor to me.

    I am also sad – for today is the one year anniversary of my mother passing. I think the two are very intertwined.

    I was always raised to be independent. I was taught how to take care of myself and not to rely on others to bail me out of my problems. I even knew how to change a tire on a car before I could drive. This is what my mother and father taught me. But I was also taught to help out when you can.

    I just think sometimes that if everyone could have had a mom like mine – caring, non judgmental, loving, kind, but yet stern when needed- that instilled a work ethic and made me believe I could do anything -a lot of the hate mongering might end.

    In a way, to me, Romney was that responsible adult that loved, was kind, stern when needed and projected a work ethic that made at least 1/2 the USA believe he could help out a broken (in my opinion) United States of America.

    I just pray for all those who need the extra encouragement to stay on a path of a Prosperous America!

  23. 27

    Thank you so much for writing that! You just snapped me right out of the funk I was in. I love how you can find the positive and hopeful side of absolutely anything!!!

  24. 28

    Amen……amen.

  25. 29

    i loved every single word
    really needed this post today,thank you.
    never stop being you.
    you amaze me.

  26. 30

    I wish people could discuss political disagreements as respectfully as you do. It bothers me that people get so invested in a particular politician that they take it as a personal attack when someone votes against that politician. Democracy is about coming to decisions through compromise and debate, and ultimately working together. The election is just one piece of it; we all still have to work to make our voices heard on each policy issue.

  27. 31

    I saw your FB post last night and I thought it was very respectful. Of course we don’t all have the same opinion. Would life be boring if we did?!

    I had five people unfollow me on Twitter last night because of my political opinions. I was happy, they were not, and even though I too was very respectful, aparently my joy was all wrong. Which is funny because I read their comments daily. Knowing we differ. And being OK with it.

    But whatev. Life goes on. And guess what? No one died today from a team not winning. Heck, not a darn thing is different today than yesterday. Other than the Nor’easter heading my way.

    KK

  28. 32

    This is a fabulous post, Ashley! We may not agree politically but I found your honesty and the way you presented your feelings refreshing. I woke up this morning, read my FB feed, and felt such despair and anxiety over way the people were choosing their words. One of my main goals as a parent is to raise boys who will grow into kind, respectful, compassionate men. If we don’t treat others with kindness and respect, how on earth can we expect our children to?

  29. 33

    Wow! I’m simply stunned….although we are on different sides of the aisle so to speak your post last night was the only one I could stomach (and I referenced it several times today)… the fact that there was backlash has me speechless!! As you so rightly pointed out- half of the country was going to be upset with the outcome, but this is simply crazy…we’re ALL Americans folks- and so lucky we had the privelage to vote. I look to you Ashley for you optimism and as always, am never disappointed…CHOOSE JOY!!

  30. 34

    I love you and your honest, open self.

  31. 35

    Amen, sister! Well said!

  32. 36

    Thank you for putting into words what I couldn’t.

    When I was young my older brother taught me that when you point at someone there are always three fingers pointing back at you.
    Seems to me that kind of applies to comments on Facebook, blogs, etc. When you make a comment it reflects more on the kind of person you are than anything else.

    Thanks again.

  33. 37
    Tleshia Farrar says:

    LOVE it and totally agree, if our country spent half its time and money building people up we would all be in a much better state. I totally agree with stating your opinion without judging others. I think we as educated people should be able to disagree and still be friends. I have personally defriended several people during this election on both side (what ever that is) because of their ugly language and negativity towards others, really??? WHO NEEDS THAT. Well said Ashely :-)

  34. 38

    wow! i am shocked at the negative comments. i love your honesty oh and i have to tell you that i bought an epiphanie bag and LOVE it! thanks for the post on it.

  35. 39
    Letitia Jordan says:

    What a terrible shame that people un-friended you for your political post! If we all thought the same, our country would be a disaster. Good for you for speaking your peace, having an opinion, exercising your right to vote, and not letting any of this faze you.

  36. 40
    Christine Mc says:

    Well said. My thoughts exactly. As I posted on facebook, “Let us oft speak kind words to each other….”. And then I wrote my feelings out on paper and properly destroyed them today. Luv Ya!

  37. 41

    ok… i’ll admit it, i’m obsessing but i guess that’s how i deal with things… think it through to the point of exhaustion and then move on…

    i was so glad to see that u broached the subject of the election when i went on fb this morning… u were just what i needed… and as usual, u put it out there as the woman of conviction that u r in a very honest and thoughtful way and i can’t thank u enough ❤…. i did leave several posts and while i didn’t think i was being ‘off-base’ i was glad to see that u didn’t delete any of them… truth is, i used ur status as a means to help me work through my frustration, calm down and move on….

    after thinking about the election fall-out ALOT today (aka: obsessing) i’ve decided that having BO elected to another term isn’t the biggest disappointment of all to me… but rather it’s the feeling that the moral fabric of our nation has morphed into something that i don’t recognize, believe in or relate to… having 3 teenage children (2 in college, 1 in HS) i find myself so defenseless in watching the character of this country change into one that lacks civility, decency, tolerance and respect especially at a time when my young adults r attempting to journey off on their own in trying to find their way… i can only hope and pray that my husband and i have prepared them for what’s ahead… whatever that may be

    thx again for being there when i needed u…. vicki

    • 42

      ps… i would just like to add (more obsessing)… i know some ppl went overboard when posting thoughts on ur status this morning, but i couldn’t help but feel like i was witnessing one huge therapy session… with the end result hopefully being that ppl coud… let it out, calm down and move on… wishful thinking?

  38. 44

    I’m glad that you told Boo you want President to succeed. I was pleased withe the results and I think it’s horrible that people are so vocal about wanting him to fail and working to see that he fails. that doesn’t help anyone. I was a bit surprised that you commented last night on the results, but so be it. You did what you did and I didn’t think it was a negative post. It was articulate and thoughtful. I’m sorry that someone had such a strong reaction to your post that they thought they needed to defriend or leave nasty comments.

  39. 45

    For the most part I loved your post. We all need to work on coming together a little more and accepting we are all Americans and we all love our country. That said, I want to mention, not to start a huge debate (we’ve all had plenty of those), but because you and so many commenters seem so perplexed about how anyone could object to any part of your statement. Encouraging small business owners to hang in there for the next four years is an inflammatory statement. Given the overall tone of your post I would say it’s pretty mild (and unfriending you over it? Well their loss, not yours – I really mean that- I adore your blog). But given how strongly you voiced that we all accept the results and come together to choose joy (the part of your post that I find inspiring), I just feel it counteracts your overall statement a bit to throw that little bomb in there. Just my two cents, you can all unfriend me now. :)

    • 46

      Thanks Caitlyn. I accept the results….but that doesn’t mean I agree with all his policies…. that means I just shift strategies and move on….no whining about it :)

      • 47

        I appreciate that. I did vote for him, but I also don’t agree with all of his policies. And while I would have been disappointed had the results gone differently, I see that in some areas Governor Romney would have been a good choice. Most of all, I really respect your attitude of once the election is over, the person who won is our President, period. Anything less just serves to drive us further apart, which concerns me far more than who is in the Oval Office. Thank you for sharing that message to all of your followers, I think that is what we need most now.

  40. 48
    Nikki Keye says:

    You are soooo awesome…Thanks for posting this…brought a few tears to my eyes as I read this… I often feel frustrated that I have to defend my opinion to our younger employees at work. They just don’t quite get it yet. Maybe it has to do with the fact that they haven’t paid any real taxes…ever. I do agree with the respectful part of our commander in chief, and I appreciate the pep talk–yes I will see you in 4 more years–I TOO will be trying twice as hard, three times as hard….peace!

  41. 49
    Meghan Zillion says:

    We voted differently but can completely agree on this post. So well said, I am going to share this on Facebook today. More people need to remember this no matter what “side” they are on. They also need to remember that we have 1st world problems and to be grateful for our right to choose and disagree and post our opinions all over the internet.

  42. 50

    Love you and your blog, don’t stop doing what you do!

  43. 51

    Yep. I’m one of those “Mitches” too (classy, B…real classy). And I have many friends that voted differently, at least according to their facebook statuses. I think I liked the “old days” when I could only assume we disagreed, instead of straight up knowing that we did. Regardless who our president is, as a Christian, I am instructed in the Bible to pray for them and that’s what I’ll do. I’ll pray for our nation and our leaders.

  44. 52
    Amy Anderson says:

    I love love this. I NEVER talk about politics – but I will here. I’m a registered independent . . . I would say I’m a Libertarian.

    I am completely disturbed by the lack of knowledge about the state of our country. I watched many of my friends on both sides pick ONE issue or vote for someone based on the color (or not color) of their skin. I watched people insult others and act like this is a football game – and you’d better pick the “right” team. In all of the fighting, I didn’t see any facts and figures . . . any discussion of policy . . . or anything of real substance.

    The shameful thing is that the fighting mirrors that of our leaders in the House and Senate, so why should we expect more of the general public?

    I pray for all our leaders. That they can put their personal BS aside and do what’s right for everyone. That the economy gets on the right track . . . and that people educate themselves on the issues our country is facing. We need real change – change that entails less fighting and bantering, and more actual changing. :D

    Great article Ashley!

  45. 53

    Thank you for your honesty. My little girl cried this morning when Obama was reelected. Even though we voted for Romney I told her that we must give our support to the Commander in Chief. It’s a hard job but you’re right they don’t get a third chance at it. ;) Don’t stop posting your thoughts it’s important for us to speak our mind. After all we live in a free country.

  46. 54

    Well, our president is saying we need to bipartisan to get our government to work and so it only makes sense that the people who hire the President (all of us who voted) try to do the same. So much of my fb was angry remarks about being “accepting”….umm…if you are going to yell at someone telling them basically to ‘be nice’ you may want to be nice yourself. :)
    Let’s be honest, some issues are so intense we will never understand how another can have the views they do. We can’t always agree or understand each other. But the way you handled your feelings were respectful and not at all provoking Ashley. Kudos to you…..I think I would have lost my cool at some point!!

  47. 55

    Ashley, When I saw your post last night, I was so thankful to see you express your dissapointment graciously and continue to be posotive about the outcome of the election even thought it didn’t go the way you had hoped. It was such a nice change from the negative, rude, and angry posts that cluttered up my newsfeed. I am sixteen years old and I respect that so much, thank you for being a great role model to me and your Boo!

  48. 56

    I have seen many posts regarding the hate of this political season. I have been encouraged by the eloquent way some of my friends have written. I agree with you that we should be respectful of the decisions made by others. That is why we have a voting system. Children should not be subjected to this either. You have handled the situation beautiful. Your daughter is very lucky to have such a wise mother. How wonderful it would be if all people would respect others opinions and try to get along. I love your blog and find it uplifting and humorous. Thank you

  49. 57

    I saw your post last night and was relieved to see someone finally posting something that displayed a mild disappointment, because I was disappointed myself and I didn’t want to post anything. I saw countless posts from friends expressing pure joy and many of the happy ‘winners’ were posting horrible jab remarks about Romney, like school children bullying the ‘loser’. Really? I was utterly disappointed in the attitudes of people I consider friends more than the election at that point. I simply could not bring myself to participate in ANY way in the FB banter, so I didn’t read the comments you generated to help preserve the piece of mind I was forming in my own bubble. But I do want to say that when I read your post my first thought was “Good for you Ashley for being brave enough to speak your mind despite the obvious backlash this may generate?. I didn’t find it inflammatory or rude, but I wasn’t looking at it through Obama team glasses. In any case, Thank you! I pray our children can handle the burden our generation is leaving upon them and hope we have the ability to repair the damage I’ve seen over the past 20 years in the next 20 years.

    Sincerely,
    Fiscal conservative socially liberal crafter/mom/engineer/tiny-business-failure and most importantly American.

  50. 58

    I really appreciate your honest, open, and positive nature. it’s inspiring! thanks for not giving up or getting discouraged!

  51. 59

    To be honest the only thing you said that bothered me was that you don’t have a uterus so you’ll stay out of that… You are a woman. Strong, intelligent, and funny. Don’t sell yourself short.

  52. 60

    I am happy that most of the candidates and issues I support were also supported by the majority. I’m old enough to have voted in many elections, some which went my way and some not so much. One thing I know: just about no candidate is as bad or as good as we think they will be. Our three branches of government were designed so power does not rest in a single person. Sometimes this means that not enough gets done, but other times it reins in anything that is too extreme according to the society at that time. I accept that other people do not feel as I do, but I do wish people on both sides would be civil. I also believe there ought to be limits to how much is spent on campaigns.

  53. 61

    Thank you for writing this post! We agree on so many things here. I feel very passionately about politics, but I mostly keep it off my blog and social media so as not to alienate others. But this election season went nuts and by election night I was so tired of being the tolerant, (quiet), respectful one, when that’s not how I feel inside and not how so many others are acting.

    All day I’ve thought about how to share my voice and opinions respectfully and authentically, and now I’ve stumbled across this. The way you’ve handled it gives me so much inspiration!

  54. 62

    Amen. I got so SICK of posts saying “I’m going to move if Romney/Obama wins.” I heard it both ways! We live in a democratic society–We all have the opportunity to vote and there is going to be a winner and a loser. I may not be happy right along with you, but I am so thankful that there is someone else out there who understands there’s nothing to do but support our president (no matter the outcome) and hope for a better 4 years.

  55. 63

    My son was sad this morning and afraid to go to school because apparently him and another 2nd grade girl who’s family was voting for someone different than us had been going at it. He was literally in tears telling me about the things he thought she might say because the guy she wanted to win did.

    It made me so sad. For my son and that little girl. They are only 8! My husband and I are very politically active, but try very hard to give our children political education based on facts. I forgot to factor in that my son is a dramatic fellow and I should have been proactive in teaching him that it’s OK for other people to want the opposite thing that you want just as badly. That just comes to me naturally, but I forgot that he is still learning.

    Sigh.

    I don’t think your FB post was negative at all. It’s human emotion to feel disappointment when you wanted something that didn’t go your way. I read negativity last night and I wouldn’t lump you post in that category.

    Keeping with the politics/kid theme and parents helping to teach their children tolerance and grace in the face of disappointment, my cousin’s nephew had a great lesson in that this morning

    http://youtu.be/KJn467qVZgw

    Poor little guy! But what a great mom to help him see the truth and the positive in the situation. ALSO Kudos to her for having the bed made already! Those bunk beds are a pain!!!

  56. 64

    Great post. I was also disappointed but not surprised. I tend to avoid political conversations with friends though because I don’t want to deal with the negativity and don’t want to get into a shouting match. And btw it isn’t racist to not vote for him based on issues but it sure is a common misconception isn’t it.

  57. 65

    I am so shocked by the amount of negativity and hate that has surfaced. I’m watching as a foreigner on a different shore, and I truly hope my friends and family don’t behave the way I have seen people behaving towards you on facebook (and to fellow posters) after our next election.

    Thank you Ashley for providing inspiring and tolerant words. I might agree with your politics, but that is my prerogative and I certainly don’t need to be hateful just because we agree. Human beings are wonderful because of their diversity, and we should embrace that not berate, belittle and suppress any that differ from us. One of the reasons humans progress and prosper is because our diverse opinions mean we can arrive at a better solution after experimenting with alternatives and discussing. If we all agreed we’d never see the negative in anything and would be condemned to repeat every mistake already made.

    Oh dear… speech over! ;-)

  58. 66

    I don’t understand why people would be upset by your post. I thought you stated it beautifully. I was so disappointed in the outcome of the election, but I’ve been disappointed since Ron Paul didn’t win the Republican nod, and chose not to continue his campaign. But after thinking it over I think what our country needs to do is pray that Obama will lead our country in the direction that it needs to go. Pray that God will guide him every step of the way.

    One thing I will never understand though, and I apologize if I offend anyone, but if I say I don’t like Obama, then I’m suddenly a racist. Why is that? I simply don’t like his views on some things, and don’t always agree with what he does, but that has nothing to do with race. I suppose the reason is that those people simply can’t make a better argument other than scream “racist”.

  59. 67
    colleen from alabama says:

    I’m not on facebook so i didn’t read any of the stuff flying around Thank goodness. I watched to see who won and then i went to sleep. I slept really well because as my pastor said Sunday, “at the end of the day, whomever the president is, our King remains the same.” He is a loving King, I can trust HIM and have hope for the future. No promise it will be easy but Jesus is enough.

  60. 68

    Thank you for bringing the real issue to the forefront…that healthy debate and our differences are what makes this country great. When we stop respecting other opinions and people the entire fabric starts to fray. We have to support each other and this country.

  61. 69

    Thanks for a great post Ashley. I also was very disapointed in the outcome but told my kids before school that no matter who wins, we respect the office of the president. I simply can’t believe that anyone thought your post was negative. I have a brother who owns a small business and he too was hoping for a different outcome. They have been waiting to make some key business decisions until after the election because the winner would have an impact on their business. I am not sure that people who aren’t businsess owners understand all the issues involved. Thanks for always being an inspiration and tell Boo I also have a southpaw. Many, many presidents have been southpaws so maybe we will vote for Boo Hack one day!

  62. 70

    thanks for this! i feel the same way about respecting the government even though we don’t always agree with what goes on. my son(7) had elections in his class and he told me he voted for obama because his friend told him that’s who he should vote for. then the next day he said ‘ive been thinking. i want to change my vote. i voted for obama because my friend told me i should, but i want to vote for mr. romney. i like president obama, he is a nice man. but he has already had a turn. i think it should be mr. romney’s turn’ i told him i was proud about making up his own mind and that he shouldn’t ever let anyone decide what he should do. and that its his choice who he voted for. i just thought it was sweet the way he explained what was going thru his little brain!!!

  63. 71

    If only there were more people like you in this world!

  64. 72

    You’re amazing! I feel as you do on this subject and am praying for our country daily. You have such a way with words and I’m grateful to hear you give your opinion and the advice you gave Boo is perfect! Lots of love!!

  65. 73
    Linda Forest says:

    Beautiful post.

  66. 74
    Beth Ellen says:

    It was tough to watch the results, knowing our country was so divided. Someone had to win. I could have voted either way, depending on which issues I was focusing on. Watching Mitt Romney concede was unexpectedly emotional–he fought so hard, tried so hard, came so close. I hope Obama will be able, finally, with some cooperation, to lift this country up to where it belongs, to help individuals and small businesses at the same time. I am thrilled there were so many women among the winners!

  67. 75

    A beautiful, well written post. I watched the results until the end and with a heavy heart, I went to bed. The results caused some of it but it was more the negativity on my social media streams. I couldn’t believe what people were saying to each other. I had to turn it all off and couldn’t even look at it the next morning as I knew it was just continuing. I don’t understand it all and it saddens me. Thank you for writing and sharing this post.

  68. 76

    This is the kind attituide I want to see from our nation as a whole. Well written and well said!

  69. 77

    It’s sad that talking politics is now conjuring up non-political accusations. My sons were rooting for Romney without influence from me or my husband and were verbally attacked (in the same way you were on Facebook) at school for it. I find it sad that people can’t respect others opinions and differences in opinion. I also find it disturbing that it’s come to this; you are called names and disrespected if you choose the candidate someone else doesn’t. Thanks for sharing with us Ashley. Well done!

  70. 78

    I will never understand all the hatred involved with election season. Politically speaking I couldn’t disagree with you more, why on earth should that mean nothing you have to say about anything is worth hearing? In what world does not agreeing with someone who happens to be a minority make one a racist? It’s ridiculous.

  71. 79

    I was overjoyed with the outcome of the election, but even if my candidate had not won, I would have been respectful and supportive of THE president just as I always have. I think that tolerance and simple human kindness is what is lacking terribly in America today, and yes, racism still exists. So do many other social ills, and denying them does not make them go away. I can respect others opinions when they differ from mine, and agree to disagree. I can also see that the political climate for the last 5 years has been more hateful than ever.
    My 6 year old went to school cheering “Hooray for Obama- all the way to the car and into the school :) and my 13 year old’s school voted 93% Obama so he was happy also.
    My neighbor’s son goes to an expensive private school and the vote was 2% Obama…and he was perplexed and saddened that the kids were angry all day, and mean. Boys in his CHRISTIAN school group were saying they wanted to get a gun and shoot the winner and calling him nasty names. He was shocked because his parents voted 2 different ways, and they love and respect each other, so why couldnt his classmates. His mother told him to speak up with kindness and calmness and ask why they thought it was ok to threaten and want to harm the leader of our nation- or any human being for that matter -esp being christians. I look forward to hearing their anwsers. She is debating talking to the principal about promoting tolerence and acceptance.

  72. 80

    I pray our country does not become one of “INtolerance” masked under the notion of “tolerance”. I think “tolerance” is taking on a new meaning—one that means we cannot {politely} disagree on issues, but must understand everyone’s point of view and accept it. That is not practical, natural, or realistic. That sounds like Nazi Germany to me. They didn’t dare speak out against the government, their leader, and certainly not the horrific killing of innocent people. We are all unique. We will disagree. We must do so respectfully and certainly without violence or threat of violence. But to say we must be a “tolerant nation” cannot mean we must never disagree or accept another’s point of view that is not our own. I, personally, disagree with gay marriage. This goes against my personal morality. But, it does not mean I am *intolerant* of gay people. I have gay friends whom I respect—they know my feelings but they do not call me “intolerant” because I disagree with that issue. Nor should I be called “intolerant” if I disagreed on this issue even if 99% of America were for gay marriage. Nor would I be “intolerant” if gay marriage were nationally accepted as legal and I still held my same feelings. If I were to show hatred or speak out against gays, THAT would be showing intolerance. Likewise, I would not call someone who is in favor of gay marriage intolerant of MY views. They would simply be disagreeing with me on my view. I would not call you intolerant because you did not think as I do. But we (‘we’ being the fictional ‘you’ and me) would simply disagree on this matter.
    If I were to tell you I am pro-life (I am). Do you immediately bristle and think I must be intolerant of a woman’s right to choose? Am I a hater? Yes, there are hateful pro-lifer’s out there. As well as pro-choicer’s. There will always be extremes in society and those are usually who get the media attention unfortunately.
    Let’s be careful who we call ‘intolerant’ and how we choose to spread the idea of “tolerance”. Would we really want to live in a world where no one could speak their mind or vote in the manner that they feel morally led to? We can “accept” each other in a loving way without having to see eye to eye. Even on big issues. Christians follow the teachings of Christ—in a fallible way! If being Christian meant being perfect we wouldn’t need Christ. I am an imperfect Christian who is always working on improving myself in so many ways!
    I’m thankful that Ashley opened her blog to political discussion though I hope this rant of mine isn’t sounding political—just hopeful that we don’t create a country where we are expected to think single mindedly. There are countries which have been there and the outcome was never good. I have great hope for America. God bless America and each of us.

    • 81

      I totally agree! What scares me is how groups from each side and individuals are vilified over and over. It isn’t right. Honestly I was hesitant to even put a bumper sticker on my car this year because of vandalism. No one should be targeted because of their beliefs.

      • 82

        SO true Ashley! My bumper sticker is still on my desk in the house! ha! I’m not as worried about my [rusty 10 year old] van being keyed. I’m worried about what my children might hear someone scream at us. :/

  73. 83

    I’m torn on this post because I think voting is private. However, I will say, I’d really like to see a bi-partisan show/movie/documentary with responsible families, from all walks of life, discuss the candidates and why they chose to vote the way they did. That’s a “reality” show I’d tune into.

  74. 85

    Great post!! I don’t understand how people drop friends just because they don’t agree politically. Were they not very good friends in the first place? Don’t they cherish the good memories and other things in common? I had a “friend” who unfriended me in life because I went to the “dark side”and she stayed a liberal. People matter more to me, but that’s just me………..

    BTW- I subscribed to your posts and i will find you on Facebook and try to friend you there- so HA on the haters!! And I subscribed not because of this political post (which I only just saw) but because of your sense of joy and your creative spirit!!

  75. 86

    I love your post and am also disappointed with the election outcome. I find it amusing that the people who harp the most about being tolerant are the first to defriend someone with a different view.

    Having different opinions…..and being free to voice those opinions….is one of the things that makes our country great!!

    I love your blog!!!…….keep being YOU!!

  76. 87

    Thanks for the post- it was a good one. As a mom of 2, going on 3, young children and having lived in Germany, France, and Canada as an adult… I can say I am disappointed in the results of the election and the general direction the country seems to be heading in… however the government is not where my hope resides. I am thankful we live in a country where we still get to vote and I am not worried about my family and their safety everyday (I live in South America as a child and that was a concern…) Anyways, thanks for being out there with your thoughts – I wouldn’t defriend you even if we didn’t agree!

  77. 88

    I’m interested in politics and educate myself on the issues surrounding America, but I really don’t like discussing it with others. Everyone has their own views and no one will change my mind and I’m not going to change anyone else’s, so no use arguing about it!

    No hard feelings for who anyone voted for even if it wasn’t who I voted for, that’s the beauty of America, we can make our own decisions!

  78. 89

    I haven’t commented in a while but I am still here reading all your posts. This post about the election is awesome and definitely the best I have seen so far! :)

  79. 90
    Sayonadat says:

    Beautifully stated, Ashley. My husband and I cancel out each others’ vote. And you know what? There are no words of hate ornintolerance here. It’s important for voters to be educated and to vote and make the decision that’s bear for them. You are right that both candidates love our country and want to help us grow and prosper. They showed grace and passion and I think we need more of that! Thank you so very very much for sharing.

  80. 91

    I too was grateful you said something respectful regarding the election. I also don’t understand why we cannot share our opposing views and remain friends- I do not believe everyone shares my same views and that is ok. I do however believe education for beliefs is vital. My 8 year old niece came home from school the other day and asked my sister what the word was when you do not vote for the president… Racist that’s it. That’s what her little friends told her. My parents’ yard sign was vandalized and others in their neighborhood were stolen, that is true sadness and a real lesson on respecting others beliefs regardless if they are not our own. Your words mirrored mine and I’m grateful for the joy you bring in this world, and I will be praying and working hard along with you!

  81. 92

    A friend of mine made an observation that we have much to be thankful for if we live in a country where there are not tanks rolling in the streets the morning after a hotly contested election like we had a few days ago. Even if the election didn’t turn out as I hoped, I’ve decided to focus my energy on remembering what an awesome country we live in, regardless of who our leader is.

  82. 93

    Ashley, I am a little slow in getting around to reading posts, but I could not let this one go by without telling you what a classy woman you are!
    I had been very distressed by the hateful FB posts I had seen from 2 friends on the right and was so glad to see your thoughtful, measured response to your disappointment. I voted for the other guy, so was thankful for the outcome and so hopeful that we could all put the ugliness behind us and start to work together to solve the very serious problems this country has. Can you imagine what we all could accomplish if we were willing to each give a little?
    Keep up the great, inspiring work you do (wherever do you find the energy? I get tired just thinking about you!). It is appreciated.

  83. 94

    Although we are on different sides of the coin, I commend you in the way you talked to Boo! We try to do the same in our house. Unfortunately, I feel like the common respect we (as a nation) used to give our president has been lost. It is now okay to say awful, horrific things about him. I have and will continue to support ALL of our presidents that take office. I will not let me children hear me utter one ugly word about an opposing candidate or president whom I did not vote for. I want my children to understand that both have good intentions, but different ideas and paths. I want them to be healthy, respectful, and intelligent thinkers that are able to think for themselves. For me, there is nothing worse than a person that claims a party with no factual information of what that entails. And really in the end, both have undeniably good points…
    Kudos to you!!!

  84. 95

    If I had a Facebook account, I’d ask to be your friend:). Thank you for being awesome.

  85. 96

    I’m impressed by your intelligence and your heart qualities. It’s the first time I post a comment on your blog, even though I follow you day by day, from France ! A French author has written : “on ne voit bien qu’avec le coeur” (= we see well only with our heart). It reminds me of you.

  86. 97

    Wish I would have seen this sooner! Darnit! You’ll probably never see my comment and if you respond, then chances are I’ll never know anyways. lol. But I just want to put my thoughts out there in the universe as well. I agree and respect everything you said…except for one part:

    “I’m more in the center when it comes to politics and I lean into the libertarian category. I’m liberal on many social issues. I want more personal freedom, more tolerance, smaller government and a stronger economy. That means I don’t really fit into the 2 party system…..but guess what….I have to make a choice”

    I myself, don’t feel that I fit in either of the two main parties myself, but thankfully, there are OTHER parties to choose from. I hope that you didn’t just choose the lesser of the two evils–for lack of a better word because neither one is ‘evil’–because you didn’t want to “waste” your vote or “throw it away” on someone else who probably won’t win. Maybe I was just misunderstanding or over-interpreting what you were saying, but I just really hope that you were able to vote for who YOU really wanted to win and not one of the two choices who were most likely to win. I didn’t vote for either of the two main parties because I find myself feeling the way it sounds like you feel, but if we are all just voting for who we want to win from the two main parties instead of who we *really* want to win then we are doing ourselves and our country a great disservice IMO. I think it is time for our country to change, however, I’m not sure that either of the two main parties can do that. But I digress…this was certainly not meant to be a political rant, but rather a PSA to you and any future voters who may read this (all 5 of you who made it through my rant lol) to stand up and vote for what YOU believe in, not what we’re told to believe in.

  87. 98

    You Rock

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